OK, so I’m a tad overweight. My doctor sent me to a nutritionist. She was a 98-pound anorexic. She advised me of what would be “a good snack.”
“Fatfree mozarella,” she says.
“FATFREE mozarella? That’s a petroleum product! One molecule short of being plastic!” I informed her that I eat only real food. I mean, Aren’t the four basic food groups–butter, cream, sugar and chocolate?
“”Alright,” says she, “let’s take a look at the food pyramid.”
“I am the food pyramid!”